Being alive to the process of life itself
Anchoring through noticing and expanding our capacity for delight
I’m journeying through The Artist’s Way once again alongside my brother and my dear friend. I’ve walked this path one and a half times before (hah!) but always on my own. The three of us are finding so much support in the witnessing and vulnerability of showing up to this practice together and holding one another through whatever surfaces.
We are in week two and towards the end of the chapter Julia writes, “The quality of life is in proportion, always, to the capacity for delight. The capacity for delight is the gift of paying attention.” I don’t know about “always”, but I do find this to be more true than not for myself. The more I create space to slow down, to notice and cultivate presence, the better my chances are of seeing the beauty, joy, magic, and love that exists around me in and amongst the chaos, tenderness, pain, and suffering.
The sky on Tuesday night was a gift received after a long day full of nerves, stress, and an outcome I hadn’t dared let myself hope for. I’d seen a similar pastel sky in my dreams the night before and as I walked up the hill near our home I felt as if I were returning in some way.
More noticings below :)
Night dreams inspiring paintings inspiring small pockets of creative freedom.
This song (and the whole album on repeat tbh). Windows down, hand sifting through autumn, and the freshness of the cool air awakening something within.
Thursday mornings spent with Omi after dropping Cai off at school. We go to the “muffin station”. They draw squiggly pictures of dogs and crocodiles all the while narrating their illustrations while I dump the inner contents of my mind out and onto my own page. Then we walk, holding hands, pointing out the many bright orange pumpkins we see, collecting smooth chestnuts, and wondering curiously about what our squirrel friends are thinking as they gather their own collections.
“Being fully present isn’t something that happens once and then you have achieved it; it’s being awake to the ebb and flow and movement and creation of life, being alive to the process of life itself.” Words by Pema Chödrön from her book The Wisdom of No Escape that I’ve been holding close and reorienting to when I forget that this is a journey and not a destination, and there’s no need to beat myself up when I forget to breathe, or can’t seem to pause and notice, or when I get so overwhelmed that it spills out of me through impatience and anger, often painfully landing on the ones I love the most.
I’ve been practicing taking tiny moments to appreciate my body throughout the day. When I remember, I’ve been speaking these words to myself, sometimes out loud and sometimes in the quiet of my mind, “My body is sacred. My body deserves love and acceptance.” I’ve been noticing with curiosity how uncomfortable it can be to say these words sometimes as if I’m telling a lie. Other times I’m able to drink in the words like water landing in a dried-out river bed, so needed, welcomed with gratitude.
It’s not my job to know how it will happen (and it likely won’t be the way I had imagined). My job is to keep showing up, seek support, and stay connected to the magic of what inspired me in the first place.
With endless love and deep gratitude,
Raina
P.S. What are you noticing in the world around you or within you? 💌
